tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9181218990471325842023-11-15T05:11:31.787-08:00Guys Watching GIRLSAverage guys watching a far from average showMatthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-4981497909845176302013-03-19T07:55:00.003-07:002013-03-19T07:55:58.279-07:00That's All Folks<span style="font-size: small;">We've all been there. An isolated irregular heart beat or a weird <span style="font-size: small;">discolored skin patch<span style="font-size: small;"> sets <span style="font-size: small;">off a frantic <a href="http://www.webmd.com/"><span style="font-size: small;">W</span>eb MD</a> downward spiral. But then we get bored and go back to watching whatever i<span style="font-size: small;">s on TV. Hannah can't turn it off though, and she can now add "paranoid hypochondriac" to her<span style="font-size: small;"> list of ail<span style="font-size: small;">ments
that are slowly unraveling her. When David calls and demands the rest
of her pages by the end of the day, it dawns on Hannah for the first
time that she's in breach of contract. So, she calls her dad for advice
(read: money<span style="font-size: small;">) to get her out of <span style="font-size: small;">her latest jam</span></span></span></span></span>, but doesn't exactly get the response she was looking for. Up to this point<span style="font-size: small;">, we always kinda-sorta feel bad for the way Hannah's parents have treated her. She's kept <span style="font-size: small;">at <span style="font-size: small;">arms<span style="font-size: small;"> length, they completely cut <span style="font-size: small;">her off financially, and they hang up the phone when she calls them from upsta<span style="font-size: small;">te <span style="font-size: small;">New York. But now we get it. Th<span style="font-size: small;">ey've seen this movie one too many times <span style="font-size: small;">a<span style="font-size: small;">nd have finally decided they're over it. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">Marnie on the other hand, is living li<span style="font-size: small;">fe to the fullest. She just gets to kick back, get <span style="font-size: small;">her box mu<span style="font-size: small;">nched and <span style="font-size: small;">enjoy
weekend brunch with her new and improved boyfriend. In the last year,
it stands to reason that Charlie was just slaying girls left and right,
all of whom were smitte<span style="font-size: small;">n by the fact that he <span style="font-size: small;">was designing screens for a TBD iP<span style="font-size: small;">hone
app. Because that's how girls do. No matter, Marnie gets to reap the
benefits with an upgraded Charlie v. 2.0. Charlie isn't only more
sexually mature, <span style="font-size: small;">he's also wisened up a bit, and puts Marnie on no<span style="font-size: small;">tice that she shouldn't expect to waltz right b<span style="font-size: small;">ack in to where they left off. D<span style="font-size: small;">oing this, Charlie<span style="font-size: small;"> is at <span style="font-size: small;">last able to get the response out of Marnie that he'd been looking for during the entire<span style="font-size: small;">ty of their <span style="font-size: small;">relationship: an apology and the acknowledgement that she actually loves him.<span style="font-size: small;">..and his money. We'll see how long this cash<span style="font-size: small;">-grubbing ho sticks around once he gets sued for <a href="http://www.fbi.gov/about-us/investigate/white_collar/ipr/ipr">IP theft</a><span style="font-size: small;">. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">If Ray wants to keep S<span style="font-size: small;">hoshanna,
he needs to stop dicking around, and fast. His lack of ambition has
become a "real issue". So, he heads to work on his day off to<span style="font-size: small;"> tell <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mkHfQz0jX0">his boss</a> he's going back to school. Or <span style="font-size: small;">at least he tries to quit. </span>Instead o<span style="font-size: small;">f returning home to Shoshanna with a degree in Latin studies and a <a href="http://www.fashinvest.com/bloomingdales-launches-shopping-app/">Big B</a><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="http://www.fashinvest.com/bloomingdales-launches-shopping-app/">rown Bag</a> <span style="font-size: small;">filled with <a href="http://www.vogue.com.au/blogs/editors+blogs/2013+the+year+of+the+clutch,21617">pastry shaped clutches</a><span style="font-size: small;">, Ray comes back with a promotion. As Brooklyn<span style="font-size: small;"> Heights' newest coffee shop manager, surely Ray has done enough to impress Shoshanna. But no<span style="font-size: small;">t <span style="font-size: small;">so much. Turns out the problem isn't really Ray's overall ambi<span style="font-size: small;">tion,
but more his entire life outlook, shitty personality, lack of self
awareness, black soul, et. al. He even hates colors, pillows, and
ribbons, so I mean<span style="font-size: small;">, li<span style="font-size: small;">ke, really...come on<span style="font-size: small;">.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">As if Hannah's plunge couldn't get any worse, her behavior becomes even more dramatic and ins<span style="font-size: small;">ane.
Hiding under her bed from Marnie is exceedingly normal compared to the
rest of her afternoon. Within a few hours, she's cutting off her own
hair and then soliciting help from her drug attic neighbor Laird<span style="font-size: small;"> </span>to complete the look: a <a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.collider.com/uploads/imageGallery/No_Country_For_Old_Men/no_country_for_old_men_movie_image_javier_bardem1.jpg&imgrefurl=http://collider.com/entertainment/article.asp/aid/6046/cid/13/tcid/1&h=399&w=600&sz=61&tbnid=ZZ0MDarLP-_9tM:&tbnh=90&tbnw=135&zoom=1&usg=__DTEslFtt14qgRL346J2gWhK1wzA=&docid=35JRXTDolNEr9M&sa=X&ei=NHhIUbP2Ga264AP6sYD4AQ&ved=0CDUQ9QEwAA&dur=1478">retro-chic bowl cut/mullet</a>. </span>When this doesn't pro<span style="font-size: small;">ve
to be enough drama for her personal taste, Hannah faux faints and begs
Laird not to rape her...like last time. More amused tha<span style="font-size: small;">n offended by her ludi<span style="font-size: small;">crous and d<span style="font-size: small;">e</span>l<span style="font-size: small;">usional accusation, Laird calls her the single most self involved and presumpt<span style="font-size: small;">u</span>ous person he's <span style="font-size: small;">ever</span>
met, before he walks out and leaves her to deal with her own shitty
problems. Getting dressed down by a drug attic loner should be enough of
a wake up call for most, but that's clearly not gonna get it done for
Hannah. Not yet, at least.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">The
only person that can help her, the only one that can shake her from her
current nightmare state, is the only person who can match her unique
brand of weirdness. It's not gonna be her parents who <span style="font-size: small;">no longer want the responsibility. It's not go<span style="font-size: small;">nna be Marnie, from who Hannah is <span style="font-size: small;">too embarrassed to seek help<span style="font-size: small;">.
Who the fuck knows where Jesse is, so she's out. Even Laird doesn't
have a desire to sexually assault her. It can only be Adam. His spot <span style="font-size: small;">is as soft for Hannah as ever, and he's most likely t<span style="font-size: small;">ired of having to go through <a href="http://human-sexuality.med.nyu.edu/sex-therapy-faq">Occupational Sex T</a><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="http://human-sexuality.med.nyu.edu/sex-therapy-faq">herapy</a>
with his new girlfriend anyway. Missionary just ain't his style. Adam
immediately identifies something is seriously wrong with Hannah, even
before seeing her OCD twitches, so he springs into <span style="font-size: small;">immediate action. <span style="font-size: small;">Running through the streets of Brooklyn only half dressed, dodging in and out of traffic, miraculously using FaceTime e<span style="font-size: small;">ven without access to a WiFi network<span style="font-size: small;">, Adam arrives at Hannah's apartme<span style="font-size: small;">nt and kicks in the door. <span style="font-size: small;">Sweeping her into her arms and holding her like the princess he believes <span style="font-size: small;">she is <span style="font-size: small;">he tells her "I was always here" as the <span style="font-size: small;">season comes to a close and we can firmly believe that everything will be OK.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">A lot of people I <span style="font-size: small;">spoke to did not like this season <span style="font-size: small;">very
much. Many of those same people did however like this episode and
thought it brought the season to an acceptable close. One friend asked
me yesterday "So what'd you think about last night's episode?". I'll
paste my response below, <span style="font-size: small;">verbatim, rather than try to articul<span style="font-size: small;">ate some synopsis with a grander and more elabor<span style="font-size: small;">ate point to make.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Un<span style="font-size: small;">fortunately, while i<span style="font-size: small;">t was a "feel good" episode</span></span></i> <span style="font-size: small;"><i>it kinds of <span style="font-size: small;">just b<span style="font-size: small;">ecame the <span style="font-size: small;">same thing as every other show. The whole momentum and <span style="font-size: small;">cult following <span style="font-size: small;">they picked up from the first season, of being a true representation<span style="font-size: small;"> of relationships and the lives of 20 somethings kind of <span style="font-size: small;">fell apart this year. It all cul<span style="font-size: small;">minated in that final episode. Rather tha<span style="font-size: small;">n continue on the path set in that first season, the show devolved into a typical ending from any Rom Com<span style="font-size: small;">, thusly, being a show that is not worth blogging about anymore. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></i></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span> </span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">It's been real, everybody<span style="font-size: small;">.</span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;">Mad Men in just a couple weeks<span style="font-size: small;"> and</span> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VuiQl5Jzsyg"><span style="font-size: small;">g</span>uess who's pumped</a><span style="font-size: small;">...</span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span>Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-29970808229291985772013-03-12T11:55:00.000-07:002013-03-12T11:55:47.937-07:00"Breathe & Stop"In the penultimate episode of Season 2, it appears Adam has finally been domesticated. Between the <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000113/">Sandra Bullock</a>
rom-coms, the happy-go-lucky smiles, and the freedom from Hannah, Adam
has found some inner peace. Even if he isn't allowed to cum inside
Natalia, even if she doesn't like being on top, and even if she is the
good two shoes girlfriend from <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMPrZWuhI7I">Swim</a><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMPrZWuhI7I">fan</a>, these things don't matter that much because Adam is no longer feral. And as we know, <a href="http://news.nationalpost.com/2013/03/08/dianna-hanson-killed-by-lion-at-cat-haven/">nothing ba</a><a href="http://news.nationalpost.com/2013/03/08/dianna-hanson-killed-by-lion-at-cat-haven/">d can ever happen</a> when you try to lock up a wild animal.<br />
<br />
Hannah
on the other hand, hasn't exactly found quite the same level of
serenity. Her OCD ticks have become volcanic in their volatility, her
editor hates the work she's submitted for her ebook, and she's being
asked to seriously consider naming her work "Life on My Back". As if
this all isn't enough to put her meltdown into full fledged overdrive,
she's got a chunk of wood sticking an inch out of her ass and a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8omE8XPeYE">Q-Tip</a>
(sorry, I just couldn't resist) jammed straight into her brain stem. At
this point, we've gotten used to seeing Hannah in varying states of
discomfort, but this is an entirely different scenario. The extreme
anguish and absolute, painful misery painted across her face at the
hospital is a new low for our star character. This is what we call rock
bottom.<br />
<br />
At Charley's
"Congrats-to-Me-and-My-20,000-Average-Monthly-Users-Party", Ray is
decidedly unimpressed by the fare...and Shosh is unimpressed by Ray's
lack of enthusiasm. The end to this immature relationship is
frighteningly close. Even putting aside the fact that Shosh is a cheat,
her opinion of Ray has changed as well. He's no longer the mysterious
and intriguing intellect. He's just kind of a dick. While that may be
desirable for about half the female dating population, it certainly
isn't her style. Even when she finally confesses to Ray about her romp
with the doorman, his blind love and acceptance of this fact, provides
what seems to be the final nail in the coffin. I can't really blame her.
Ray is dead weight and all washed up, and she still has the majority of
her 20's to look forward to. She can't be held back from new prospects.
She's even patrolling for some new ass at the party and lands on a
goober who would seemingly love to spend late nights with her at trendy
restaurants with all the other New York City <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2267817/Stop-Instagramming-food-Restaurants-ban-diners-photographing-meals-disrupts-ambience.html">douche bags who Instagram their appetizers</a>.<br />
<br />
If
this was where the party started to wind down, the night could still be
considered salvageable. However, Marnie has other plans. Following her
(brand new) life long dream of becoming a singer, she uses Charley's
work party as her audition tape. Charley's work associates are less than
entertained by her sonata remix of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsO6ZnUZI0g">Stronger </a>which
I find rather surprising. I've been to a handful of dull pizza parties
in varying offices and I've yet to see anybody do an impromptu karaoke.
If I had, I would think people would have the decency to be amused by
it, rather than just exchange blank death stares, but, fucking hipsters.
Before you write off Marnie too quickly though, it looks like the girl
is dumb like a fox. Her stunt gets Charley back, and if you think that
was just some fortuitous consequence of her public embarrassment, then
you clearly don't know Marnie well enough. That shit was manipulation at
it's finest.<br />
<br />
At another party, an engagement party to
be precise, Natalia brings Adam around to meet her friends and
socialize. It's definitely not Adam's scene (because people and full
sets of clothes are present) so once his only option becomes small talk
schmoozing, he decides to go get some air. If he had only walked outside
30 seconds later, everything could have been different. But on this
particular night, at that particular moment, fate intervenes and Hannah
strolls by. At her lowest moment, seeing Adam is enough to make
everything a-ok again. She lights up when she sees him and squints out
tears of nostalgia when he calls her "kid". That's all she gets from him
though. Adam is over her, happily in a relationship, and has no
interest in catching up with her. He leaves her alone outside, and
returns to the party, <strike>clearly unflappable</strike>. Adam is
rattled BIG TIME. So much so that he falls directly off the wagon for
the first time in years. As Adam continues to get sawced, the night
becomes a blur of dancing, drinking, crawling on the floor, rim jobs,
rough sex, and his take on a Jackson Pollack painting. I will say, the
last time I actually saw semen pictured in TV or (non pornographic) film
was <a href="http://www.illtakethatinpurple.com/2012/10/obsession-alert-ear-cuff.html">many years ago</a>. So that was refreshing.<br />
<br />
Heading
into the season finale, every character has regressed to their Season 1
roots. Charley and Marnie are likely to end up back together. Jessa is
nowhere to be found. Shosh and Ray will end up single, each incapable of
companionship in their own way. Adam is as big a degenerate as ever.
The only wild card here is Hannah. She's built to march to the beat of
her own drum but her path seems even harder to predict now. Before she
was flighty and misguided but now she's troubled. What's worse, is that
her friends, the eponymous <i>GIRLS</i>, don't even seem to notice. Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-61510599097215729412013-03-05T08:26:00.001-08:002013-03-05T10:15:29.622-08:00A Return to the FamiliarCriticism for the last few episodes appears to have made Hannah a bit
jumpy. OCD-level jumpy. Now, I’ll admit…at first I thought this was a
cheap plot point just to make every bit of unimportant <span style="font-size: small;">minutiae</span>
seem high stakes and dramatic. Then I rationalized the erratic behavior
as being caused by having to sit through a Judy Collins concert, which
would be enough to make me suffer a similar fate. However, after the
episode ended, I learned that <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/lena-dunham-stars-obsessive-compulsive-disorder/story?id=18513623">Lena Dunham actually suffered from OCD</a>
and my stance softened a bit. It didn’t soften out of pity or out of
guilt, it did however soften because one of my main criticisms of the
show this season has been that I feel it’s steered away from relatable
situations for 20-somethings. The fact that the show’s writer is
addressing a very real and very personal life situation directly
addresses that criticism of mine, so I’ll tip my hat and move along.<br />
<br />
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But
there’s another reason why this episode was stronger than the past
ones. It’s because the Boys are back in the mix. Charley, Adam, and Ray
all have significant relevance in this episode and it’s because of that,
that the episode is smoother, more interesting, better paced, and
obviously funnier. Take that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBmMU_iwe6U">Beyonce</a>.
The episode's title proves to be rather apropos. I'm gonna say that
"It's Back" refers to the general rhythm of the show that we all enjoyed
from Season 1. </div>
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<br /></div>
Ray
has to confront the fact that his antisocial and cynical ways are not
going to end up being a great match for blabber-mouth Shosh. While I
would agree that being a <a href="http://www.comedycentral.com/video-clips/53hbpy/it-s-always-sunny-in-philadelphia-dennis--fraternity-house">33 year old hanging out with college kids</a>
is about as creepy as it gets, in this situation it probably would have
been prudent to suck it up so he could keep tabs on his woman. Wanna
know what happens when you don’t keep tabs on your woman? A dude from
another HBO show is gonna jack her from you, that’s what. I will say
though, props to Shosh because I did not think she had the stones to
cheat….let alone with a doorman…played by an <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=1fkPulibKVM&feature=endscreen">actor who only got 2 seasons</a> on his previous show before getting cancelled.
<br />
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But
Ray isn’t the only one who should be keeping an eye on the person he
cares about. While Hannah is busy at the shrink trying to get her
nervous OCD ticks under control, Adam is scoring dates at AA. Adam’s
been clean and sober for a while but he’s feeling stressed out and
unburdens himself at a meeting, much to the delight of another attendee.
In fact, the woman is so impressed by his honesty and poise that she
sets Adam up with her daughter. The mom might be a kook, but the apple
fell immensely far from the tree. She’s hot, grounded, and Adam appears
to have a new sex toy to play with. </div>
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<br /></div>
While
Hannah and Ray allow their loved ones to play the field, Marnie is
doing quite the opposite. Upon hearing that Charlie has started his own
company, built it out to what appears to be 20 employees, and secured
what looks like a multi-million dollar loft space, (all in a manner of a
couple months), she shows up unannounced at his office. Dating an
artist is cool and all, but <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4e0n7vTLz1U">dating a millionaire is</a> way cooler. Unfortunately for Marnie, the entire genesis of Charley’s new found wealth is behind his <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/slideshow/tech/2011/07/06/dumbest-craziest-and-most-useless-iphone-apps-from-to-z/#slide=1">new app</a>:
FORBID which prevents you from calling somebody you hate…and it was
inspired by her. Ouch. Marnie should see some royalties on this though,
no? <br />
<br />
When Marnie arrives home she has a mini-freakout
which Ray finds amusing. While she bemoans the fact that sane,
have-it-together people like her are forced to struggle through life,
sad sacks like Charlie get to be rich and lavished with the gifts of
luxury and fame. Or something like that. Ray, always the purveyor of
sage wisdom, advises Marnie to stop all the petty bullshit and finally
pursue what she wants. Enough of the hostessing and gallivanting. Marnie
confides that her true passion is to be a singer and then belts out
some lovely sounding tune that I was too lazy to Google.<br />
<br />
What
we have at the end of the this episode is something that we haven’t had
possibly all season: many different possible paths for all the show's
characters. This is a good thing and will actually have me looking
forward to next episode for the first time all year. Will Shoshanna’s
indescrietion bring an end to her relationship with Ray? Will Marnie
become a professional singer? Will she sing naked? Will Adam start
dating Natalia seriously? Or will she only make him realize how much he
misses Hannah? Will Charlie ride his wealth to party it up with models
in Ibiza? Or will he come crawling back to Marnie? If Charley comes back
to her, will Marnie get naked? Will Jessa reappear? Is she going to be a
peripheral character the rest of this season? Will Hannah conveniently
conquer her recent bout of OCD to make room for a new plot point? Will
her OCD continue to plague her for the rest of the season to become a ½
season arc? Will you continue reading this blog? Will Marnie get naked?<br />
<br />
Yes. No. No. Maybe. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. Yes also. Yes. No. Probably not. Sadly...I doubt it. Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-34088662075132233742013-02-26T11:15:00.001-08:002013-02-26T11:18:39.110-08:00It's Time to Get Back to the BasicsWanna know why, contrary to the opinion of most others, I didn't refer to Episode 5: <i>One Man's Trash</i>
as the worst episode in the history of the series? Because I needed to
save room for a potentially worse episode. This was that episode. In
even simpler terms, this did not make for good televesion. Sunday night
premium cable series that only run 12 episodes in a season do not get
the luxury of having multiple filler episodes in a single season. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POQqe0nsAtY">That's for shitty network TV</a>. <i>GIRLS</i> has now had 2 of these in the last 3 weeks. Believe me, there were <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwDZFqW75_0">more entertaining things</a> I could have been watching on Sunday. Let's get into the episode, but know that I'm not done railing yet.<br />
<br />
After
a season and half of flighty behavior, Jessa's character is now being
explained. Even before her dad appears, it's clear that he's the genesis
of Jessa's flaky and unpredictable ways. Naming one of your kids Lemon,
filling your station wagon with computers from the mid 80s, and living
with a woman who's of the belief that we're all <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frxvwSrertY">living inside a giant video game</a>
(because scientists are liars) is definitely enough to royally fuck up
your daughter. Things might turn out ok though. Hannah is undergone a
major metamorphasis: from "wound" to "cushion". They might make it
through this weekend yet. <br />
<br />
There isn't really all that much to do in the upper reaches of those <a href="https://maps.google.com/maps?oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&ie=UTF-8&q=manitou+new+york&fb=1&gl=us&hq=manitou+new+york&cid=0,0,4192286143426329119&ei=u_ssUZWnLPDp0QH18YDYDg&ved=0CKgBEPwSMAM">sleepy Hudson River towns</a>,
other than look at vintage Penthouse (under rated activity) and eat the
family pets, is there? So it stands to reason that once dinner is
through, it's time for a little joy ride. Frank and his "friend" Tyler
take Hannah and Jessa on tour of the country, complete with hairpin
turns, <a href="http://www.easywhip.com/whipchar241.html?gclid=CNLA2_7M1LUCFcme4AodlnQAWA">whip-its</a>,
and stunt driving. Hannah gets to be the normal one for once and begs
out of the car before there's a serious accident. But that's about where
Hannah's level thinking ends. Before long, she's allowing Frank to jizz
in her leg fat crease, smack in the middle of a grave yard.<br />
<br />
This
episode isn't about Hannah though, it's about Jessa. We learn that
Jessa has already blown off her past 6 visits with her dad and that
she's fully aware she and her family aren't "like other people". But are
these explanations or excuses? Jessa expresses her disappointment in
her father's inability to stay put, be reasonable, and act as an example
of good behavior for her. All fair criticisms. However, if Jessa is
able to recognize and correctly evaluate these things as character
flaws, how does she have no ability to make changes in her own life<span style="font-family: inherit;">?</span>
There's a clear cognitive dissonance here. It's incongruous to demand
that her father suddenly become more responsible when she demands to be
permitted her own free spirit ways. Is your life style a curse or a
choice, Jessa? It can't be both. There's one other problem with this
scene, as well. While it's a nice moment and does a good deal to explain
Jessa's character, wouldn't it have been more impactful if, oh I dunno,
she was actually in this season? What possible emotions can we be
expected to feel for somebody who has been pushed aside as fringe
character? Not to mention that Jessa's grand solution, when confronted
with the ghosts of her past and abandonment issues and irresponsibility
is to...run away. <strike>Brilliant</strike>. Not interesting.<br />
<br />
<i>GIRLS</i>
needs to make two major adjustments and they need to be made quickly if
the show has any desire to recapture its appeal from Season 1. <br />
<br />
1)
Stop grossing out the viewing public, simply for the sake of grossing
out the viewing public. I can watch 2 Girls, 1 Cup on the internet if I
ever have that burning desire. (No link, you'll have to use Google).
Listen, I get why Hannah went naked in the first season. Not all women
have model bodies and it was a healthy expression of realistic female
sexuality and all that shit. I get it. After that, Hannah's nudity came
in waves. It was a real legit middle finger to all the critics who
demanded that she put her clothes back on. I get that, too. That's fine.
But now that people are seemingly ok with it, and even commending her
for her bravery, who do I need to watch her bent over naked, pissing
blood with a UTI? Seriously...what is being added to the show? What is
being accomplished? I know it's not funny or amusing to guys. If it's
some inside joke just for the girls, doesn't that go against what made
the show interesting to begin with? Wasn't this supposed to be a show
that <i>all</i> 20-somethings could relate to? Isn't that why I started blogging about it in the first place?<br />
<br />
2) Get back to reality. The charm of Season 1 was that it was truly believable most of the time. <a href="http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/hannah%20and%20adam">Awkward relationships</a>, getting <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3y0TH4MLxg">dosed at a party</a>,
struggling to pay rent...these are the things that 20-somethings can
relate to. We finally had a show that presented urban yuppie life for
what it was (more or less). Most 24 year olds don't eat at places <a href="http://blog.opentable.com/2010/sex-and-the-city-restaurants-where-the-fab-four-dined-in-new-york/">like this</a> on a weekly basis or live in apartments that look <a href="http://friends.wikia.com/wiki/Monica%27s_Apartment">like this</a>. <i>GIRLS</i>
started out honest. It was representative. It felt believable. Holing
up with 40 year old divorce doctors and traveling to the sticks to bang
19 year old homosexuals in cemeteries does not feel representative. Or
believable. Or entertaining.<br />
<br />
In fact, it's about as honest as losing your virginity to Rihanna. Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-58292363160192820232013-02-19T08:49:00.004-08:002013-02-19T08:49:44.550-08:00Happiness is finding a pencil, and some other shitAfter last week's debacle, Hannah and the gang return for a much more
typical (and clothed) episode. What's even better, is that once she
gets over her wave of panicked nausea, Hannah can start working on an
e-book. Her mentor may have only given her 1 month to complete the
project, and he may or may not actually know what a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rE6iiiDdTNY">pista</a><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rE6iiiDdTNY">chio is</a>, but I just don't see how there's any way this can turn out badly.<br /><br />On
the other side of town, Booth Jonathan and Marnie are lying in bed when
it's revealed that Booth's assistant, Sujin, tasted some of his rose
water ice cream. Clearly, this is a fire-able offense and Sujin is
relieved of her duties, permanently. Shorthanded and now in a bind,
Booth asks Marnie if she wants to host a party for him that evening.
Marnie, ever the social climbing wannabe debutante, interprets the
request as hosting <i>with</i> Booth and not <i>for</i> him. So, while
she thinks that things are starting to happen on "a fancy, nice level"
for her finally, she's nothing but hired help. <br /><br />Shosh wants
nothing more than to give Ray's life a bit of a kick start, but this is a
tall task. Ignoring Shoshanna's prodding to try out a business seminar,
Ray has his ambitions fixated on a much more important goal: retrieving
his lost copy of <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0082Z1CVQ/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_2?pf_rd_p=486539851&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0767851013&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=1CVB0BY8PK6CS6BCX5XQ">Little Women</a></i>.
Unfortunately, the book is somewhere in Adam's lair, and it now falls
on Ray to retrieve it. Adam greets Ray with a tornado of fury, as
anything connected to Hannah is enough to send him into a blind
emotional rage at this point. Adam's outburst is nothing compared to his
newly acquired <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0k21yeVMbM">watch dog</a>,
though. When Ray finds out that Adam actually stole his new junkyard
pet, he dresses him down something fierce. Dog is an asshole. Dog is not
treated that well by others. Dog is a victim. Dog deserves a shot at
redemption. Dog is an extension of Adam. <br /><br />With the show's two best characters finally put together for a significant amount of screen time, Ray and Adam sojourn to <a href="http://nymag.com/news/features/52452/">Staten Island</a>
on an Odyssey to return Dog. As the dynamic duo trudge through the muck
and grime of the worst outer borough, they reflect on past
relationships. Perhaps because they are both honest men, or more likely
because they are kind of "weird looking", their views on women and most
other things are remarkably similar. Well, similar on matters other than
Hannah. When Ray drops some knowledge about Hannah being difficult,
selfish, unattractive, and a somewhat terrible person, something in Adam
snaps. In spite of his best efforts to rid himself of any emotional tie
to Hannah, Adam's love for her is still deeply engrained. Overwhelmed
by his own emotional display, Adam ditches Ray with Dog and goes home.
Left to his own devices, Ray can't even convince the dog's rightful
owner to take it back. Ray's a loser; this is something he has come to
accept about himself at this point. His relationship with Shoshanna is
one of convenience, laziness, and immaturity. He has no real ambition
and no clear way to break out of his funk. He's just a fucking loser, a
faggot who wears faggot pants, a kike lookalike, dog fucking loser from
yogurt town. Not my words, but they'll do just fine. <br /><br />While Ray
cries all alone in self pity, Marnie is surrounded by all of her new
"friends" at Booth's party. Hannah can only last through a half
conversation involving periods, Dairy Queen, e-books, and other art
shows before she pulls an <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=irish%20goodbye">Irish good-b</a><a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=irish%20goodbye">ye</a>.
As the night winds down, Booth attempts to pay Marnie for her work that
evening and it is only at this point that she realizes she was not
actual hosting the party...but working it. Marnie inevitably breaks down
when she realizes her misunderstanding of the situation, but if she's
looking for sympathy from Booth, she's barking up the wrong tree. You
see, Booth had a different understanding from Marnie as well. He was
under the impression that Marnie actually liked him for who he
is...rather than the idea that he represents as an artist and a
socialite and a minor celebrity. Once Booth throws a couple of wine
bottles for dramatic effect, Marnie takes this as her cue to go home,
leaving Booth with his own mess to clean up.<br /><br />By the end of the
night, Hannah is in bed and stuck on page one of her yet-to-be e-book.
In need of some comforting consoling, she calls Marnie who is just as
happy to be comforted after her night. But instead of an open
conversation, the two hide behind facades of faux happiness. Hannah lies
about her progress on her book and Marnie lies about her night also,
pretending to be watching fire flies in Booth's garden, rather than
huddled up next to a subway grate. The phone call stalls awkwardly as
the breadth of their distance becomes obvious and they hang up,
disappointed. If they can't be honest with each other, recognizing how
much worse off they are when separated, there is little else to discuss.
<br />
<br />Expectations. That's what this is all about, isn't it?
Expectations and happiness.... What we expect from our professional
success (Hannah); what we expect from our relationships (Marnie/Booth);
what we expect from the people we care about (Shosh); most importantly,
what we come to expect of ourselves (Ray). It's a reflective episode,
more so than many others and it's not like Girls is ever light on the
introspection. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKKjqzkGo3o">Charlie Brown might say other wise</a>,
but in my book, happiness is pretty easy to quantify. It's the
relationship between what we expect to have, and what we actually do.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-84745225517306812922013-02-15T07:18:00.002-08:002013-02-19T09:58:54.475-08:00Who's More Disgusting: Guys or Girls?<i>After the last two weeks, between naked flabby ping pong and
shared-bathtub snot rockets, I've come to a firm conclusion: girls are
fucking gross. They're gross on a wholly different level from men. It's
as if there's not even a remote sense of acceptable social norms on
their part; an alien species living amongst civilized humans. So I went
to a female friend and asked her if she could explain to me what the
deal was. This was JayVee's response:</i><br />
<br />
It should be noted that I'm an avid reader of <i>Guys Watching Girls</i>.
Such an avid reader that you could essentially title this guest post I
was asked to write as Girls Watching Guys Watching Girls, but that would
come off way too confusing. You know, just as confusing as how I felt
watching this past Sunday's episode where Hannah inexplicably holes up
in a random dude's brownstone for 48hrs.<br />
<br />
In my opinion, last Sunday's episode of <i>Girls</i>
was HBO's new equivalent to <i>The Sopranos</i> series finale where the masses
shouted a unanimous, angry "WTF just happened?!" But not in that fun
retrospective way of, "let's deconstruct the episode to find the deeper
meaning in it." No. Two days later and I'm still trying to process what
the fuck happened coupled with a more knee-jerk reaction of, "man, I
wish I could UNWATCH that shit and strike it from my mind completely."
But I can't, so onward and upward or so they say.<br />
<br />
After
a brief
Facebook IM convo with Matt, which centered around all the things that I
despise in Hannah and how revolting of a character she is, he swooped
in for the kill. A guest post request. But this request was not born
solely out of Hannah's repulsive ways (i.e. naked ping pong or pretty
much anything at this point), but also the previous week, which treated
us to Jessa's bathtub snot-rockets, which apparently got Matt thinking
"girls are just plain gross." Well, dear Matthew. I agree. I agree so
much that I could've dedicated this post to all the reasons, as a
female, I find girls to be gross. Seriously, girls are fucking GROSS.
But have you done any self-examination lately? I
mean, I'm sure at SOME point SOME female has told you that a certain
thing you do drives them mad, right? If not, here's a starter list for
you to contemplate.<br />
<br />
1.
<b> Silent, but Deadly</b> -- Yes, the sneaky deployment of bodily gas. We get
it, people are gassy, girls are too, but the sneak-attack method of
releasing said gas is disgusting. I'm not talking just a little
wind-break. No. I'm talking about that stank that you boys release that
basically can bring you to the point of choking and tears.<br />
<br />
2.
<b>Persistent Ball Scratching</b> - Not the quick itch and move on. The full on
crotch dig, where you basically move your junk to excavate. You know
you're guilty. I often wonder if every guy's junk (without known
diseases) could be that itchy or is it more of a nervous tick? Are you
simply checking to make sure it's still there? I don't get it. <span style="color: cyan;">(<i>Editor's Note: I sense a twinge of jealousy)</i></span><br />
<br />
3.
<b>Peeing on the rim of the bowl and/or floor</b> - I cannot comprehend this
behavior no matter how hard I try. I used to chalk this up to laziness, I
still believe that's part of the reason, but the bigger issue is
probably that maybe your mother loved you TOO much. You were
too-coddled. You were pampered. And now, as an adult male, you think all
females will clean up your piss. Well, this is not the case.<br />
<br />
4.
<b>Peeing in the shower</b> - It seems counter intuitive to have TWO bullets
dedicated to urination, but it must be said. You do it. You know you do.
Pee BEFORE entering the shower...but see #3 as a reminder to get it in
the damn bowl. I don't care if the shower provides "more surface area."<br />
<br />
5.
<b>Speed Eating</b> - This seems mild compared to the other offenses, but it's
gross. It's frustrating to sit across from someone who basically scarfs
down his food in less than 10 minutes. This behavior also encompasses,
mouth-open chewing, exaggerated eating/drinking noises, and usually
culminates in a belch. You're disgusting.<br />
<br />
Granted there are more
irritating and disgusting behaviors, but in my opinion they're probably
smaller infractions and generally can be overlooked. Right? Or maybe I'm
blocked most other behavior out of my brain... now if only I could find
a way to block Hannah from my brain. She's a car wreck... and I just
can't look away.<br />
<br />
-- JayVee Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-53237902408292342842013-02-12T07:24:00.001-08:002013-02-12T07:29:31.279-08:00Sex, Cries, and Ping Pong Paddle Tape<br />
It's been tough sledding for GIRLS on the ratings front the last
two weeks. First going head to head with the Super Bowl and now the
Grammys. No matter. Lena Dunham got to watch boyfriend <a href="http://www.northjersey.com/arts_entertainment/music/190797921_fun__s_Jack_Antonoff_makes_Bergen_County_proud.html">Jack Antonoff (guitarist for the band Fun</a>.)
perform live on stage and then take home some hardware too. Fun. fact:
before dating Dunham, Antonoff was with Scarlett Johansson. I shit you
not. Talk about a nosedive down the pecking order. Another Fun. fact:
the band decided to go with a period instead of an exclamation point in
their name because, as lead singer Nate Ruess puts it "we're so boring
that paint watches <i>US</i> dry." Only one of those facts is made up,
try to guess which one. But that's neither here nor there. Never afraid
to bare all, Dunham seemed determined to upstage the Grammys in <a href="http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2013/02/katy-perry-grammys-dress-whoa/">more ways than two</a>.<br />
<br />
This
episode really seemed to rub people the wrong way. I've received more
texts and phone calls from friends regarding this episode than all the
other ones combined. While the near unanimous assertion is that this was
the worst episode in the history of the series, I do not agree. I do
however think that it reeked desperately of self-seriousness and it
tried way too hard to win some sort of recognition as the most profound
30 minutes in television history. It wasn't. It was far from it.
Sometimes when you <a href="http://hollywoodjesus.com/movie/radio/Radio1.jpg">reach too much for the accolades, you fall flat</a>. And that's what this felt like. <br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
When
Patrick Wilson (who is now sure to be a household name) enters Grumpy's
with a rather benign request, he is met with Ray's hostility. Maybe
Shosh isn't helping him relieve his tension as much as he'd like. Maybe
Hannah's fleshy thighs put him in a horrid mood. Maybe Ray just loves
having his trash in other people's cans. Whatever the reason for Ray's
emotional outburst, Hannah is so appalled that she quits on the spot (or
at least "quits" for the day) and head's straight to the customer's
house to apologize. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Racked with
guilt, Hannah comes clean and admits that she is in fact the Trash
Bandit. Joshua is amused by her earnestness and recognizes that, while
inconvenient, the whole episode was a rather victimless crime. Despite
the fact that he's a hard 10 and you should <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74XjOui-Oho">never stoop more than 2 points</a>,
Joshua accepts Hannah's advances. Hannah has now spanned the entire
spectrum from brownstone owning doctors to semi-recovering heroin
addicts, further illustrating the point that any girl can sleep with any
guy, just so long as she wants to. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here
is where the episode starts to get slightly interesting. Their late
afternoon romp turns into a full blown 2 day love affair. Hannah and
Joshua play hookie from work and enjoy 36 hours of naked ping pong, sex,
more naked ping pong, reading the paper, steaks, and other
run-of-the-mill weekday activities. In a new twist, Hannah seems truly
happy, and more importantly, comfortable. Comfort and stability are
always elusive for the 20-something crowd and Hannah is now experiencing
it all for the first time. But the comfort and whimsical dreams of a
different life are fleeting.</div>
<br />
As Hannah wakes up
from her steam shower induced coma, she begins to sob uncontrollably. An
epiphany hits her when she least expects it. All the things that she's
mocked, that she's written about, that she's snarkily judged, these are
the things she actually covets. Hannah is smart and sensitive but she is
also lonely and poor. All college graduates want more for themselves
and more poignantly they <i>expect</i> more <i>of</i> themselves. For
some it's working for a noble cause instead of a boring 9-5, for others
it's insane wealth that gives them the freedom to pursue their
interests, but what Hannah realizes is that she has none of it. No
fridge stock piled with food. No lemonade in crystal glasses. No
installation of a solarium to look forward to. No job that makes a
difference for anybody. Certainly no automated electronic steam shower.
She might be a clever writer who wants to disavow the creature comforts
through clever prose. But she's not special, she isn't unique, and she's
certainly done nothing to earn those things. The realization <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hz65AOjabtM">hits her like a ton of proverbial bricks. </a><br />
<br />
Hannah's
blissful nonchalance is quickly (and correctly) re calibrated in
Joshua's eyes into flakey-ness. Hannah emotionally unravels right in
front of Joshua and although he does his best job to calm her and ease
her anxiety, it's clear that this pseudo relationship is already dead to
rights. As a pity present, Joshua allows her to stay one more night but
when she wakes in the morning, Hannah realizes she's alone in the
house. After taking out the trash and making the bed, Hannah leaves the
brownstone and walks down the street alone as she's ever been. All she
has is a ringing reminder rattling around in her skull of what could
have been, a fleeting taste of what she really wants, and the painful
realization that she is nowhere near ready for it.Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-30009807791624074592013-02-05T08:24:00.002-08:002013-02-05T08:31:58.234-08:00Dinner is ServedThe only question that really matters is ‘which dinner was more
painful to watch?’ Normally, an awkward dinner with the in-laws is as
bad as it gets (like I’d fucking know). That might not be the case here,
though. Between butt plugs, a battle of the exes, and a boyfriend
turned squatter, Hannah’s dinner party could be the runaway favorite as
the more painful of the two. More on all of this in a minute.<br />
<br />
For
the second time, it seems like Elijah will be exiting Hannah’s life.
But not his stuff. Hannah lays claim to every one of Elijah’s earthly
possessions and since (a) George paid for it all anyway and (b) Elijah
can’t afford to pay his final month of rent, he <a href="http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Sport/Pix/pictures/2012/8/4/1344074180696/Oscar-Pistorius-002.jpg">doesn’t have much of a leg to stand on</a>.
In a last ditch effort to hold on to some his belongings, Elijah tries
to recoup some of his sunk costs in the form of Burrito add-ons
(Guacamole, spinach, et al.) but when Hannah reminds him that he held on
to their shared buttplug, the two call it even. <br />
<div>
<br />
Since
we spend the rest of the episode hopping back and forth between the
uncomfortable dinners, I’m just going to take the liberty of listing out
the most discomfiting highlights from each one, in bullet form.<br />
<br />
<u>Jessa's Dinner with the in laws:</u><br />
- good first impression is squandered with a late arrival<br />
- Jessa admits to hating the very restaurant TJ's parents selected<br />
- it's revealed that Jessa has no job...and no real desire to pursue one<br />
- it's revealed that Jessa's unemployment status may or may not have something to do with being a college dropout<br />
- it's revealed that Jessa's lack of a degree may or may not have something to do with being a recovering heroin addict<br />
-TJ's mom ain't no punk, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vwNcNOTVzY">she hollas she wants prenup, she wants prenup, YEAH</a><br />
- God likely does not exist<br />
<br />
<u>Hannah's Dinner Party:</u><br />
- Charlie, Audrey, and Marnie all realize they are co-invitees and will have to sit at a table together<br />
- Audrey is blossoming mustard entrepreneur...Marnie has had <a href="http://www.bustedtees.com/condiments">zero success with condiments</a><br />
- Shosh arrives late. <strike>Shosh lost her earring in a cab</strike>. Shosh lies to everybody. Shosh had sex.<br />
- We never get to find out where Audrey shops for all of her headbands <br />
- Shosh is graphically <a href="http://goaskalice.columbia.edu/butt-plug">educated on the proper use of a buttplug</a> <br />
- the word "butthole" is repeated ad nauseam <br />
- Audrey accuses Marnie of trying to get all up back in Charlie's butthole<br />
- Audrey accuses Marnie of being a semi-suicidal, Stepford Psycho, stalker <br />
- Marnie storms out. Charlie follows her out. Audrey storms out.<br />
- Charlie tries to rekindle things with Marnie but gets shut down because now she's dating <a href="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9ujm661nF1r4hpr9o1_500.jpg">an Ewok</a><br />
- Shosh realizes her boyfriend is homeless and squatting in her apartment<br />
<br />
It’s
pretty clear that Hannah’s dinner dominates on the uncomfortable-meter
but that doesn’t mean Jessa is out of the woods yet. No, her evening is
long from over. To nobody’s dismay and to nobody’s surprise, the Jessa
and Thomas John arrangement appears to be at its end. Jessa’s free
spirit nature is way more than Thomas John bargained for and TJ’s bland
mediocrity is clearly a poor match for Jessa as well. All that said, I
still think that the writers took a serious short cut here. As flaky as
Jessa is, and as inevitable as the divorce was, up until this point
there have been precisely ZERO misgivings regarding this arrangement. I
mean shit, up until thirty minutes before the dinner, Jessa was whipping
out her titties to get some late afternoon loving. In Episode 2, Jessa
is lecturing Hannah on the depth of her love with Thomas John... so
what's happened exactly? An uncomfortable dinner makes her realize that
Thomas John is an uptight corporate goober? I don't buy it. Not to
mention, the whole point of <a href="http://blogs.citypages.com/blotter/2010/08/top_10_famous_t.php">a trophy wife </a>is
that you're willingly giving up your money (or receiving money) as
compensation for spending time with somebody you're not attracted to.
That's the whole fucking point. How do you get blindsided by all of that
two months into the marriage? To make up for this shoddy plot
resolution, they try to distract us with a boob other than Hannah's, but
I remain laser focused on the fact that this is lazy writing. All told,
Jessa's negotiation skills<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTmXHvGZiSY"> are about on par with Dr. Evil</a> so she walks away with a paltry $11,500. Weak.<br />
<br />
In
another relationship that makes little sense to me, Shoshanna and Ray
have a heart-to-heart on the status of their arrangement. Ray is
apparently broke, homeless, and thirty fucking three years old. Why he
spends all his time with 25 year olds is a mystery to me, but I guess
beggars can't be choosers. Shosh doesn't care though because she loves
him and he loves her "so fucking much" also. But how? Normally I try not
to delve too deeply into the show's plot points but I don't get this
one either. Let alone how I think it's impossible for anybody to stomach
the verbal onslaught that Shosh spews on a minute by minute basis, but
somebody as cynical and dry witted as Ray would never (in real life)
tolerate somebody so vapid. It doesn't come together or get explained
what attributes Ray is attracted to in her. <a href="http://www.glamour.com/images/fashion/2013/02/zosia-mamet-girls-cleavage-dress-w724.jpg">Oh...right</a>.<br />
<br />
To
close out the episode, we obviously have to see Hannah's tits because a
full 25 minutes has elapsed without that happening. In a quid pro quo
of 'I'll show you mine if you show me yours', we do get to see Jessa's
chest again so I guess it sort of cancels out the prior image. But not
really. Finally fed up with her own antics and lack of life direction,
Jessa breaks down. What takes place after that is something I can't say
I'm very familiar with. At the end of <i>my</i> really shitty days, when
I climb into the bathtub with my room mates, I'm met with moral
support, solid advice, and a vigorous, deep scalp shampoo-ing. That's
how guys do. Apparently girls are much more simple. They throw snot
rockets back and forth at each other. That's enough. Nothing says "I'm
here for you" like a well timed mucus fling. If I've said it once, I've
said it a hundred times. Girls are waaaaaay grosser than boys.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fEcqbNRLc0">Bonus Coverage: Lena Dunham on Howard Stern this week. </a></div>
Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-8008384418379039892013-02-01T06:38:00.002-08:002013-02-01T06:46:55.999-08:00Kick Out the Jams...and the blow<i>This past week's episode was real heavy on the nose candy. This we already know. But it was also pretty heavy on the tunes. Lots of feel good music, lots of throw back music, and lots of party music. I'm not gonna list all the songs from last week because there are plenty of places where you can find that information on the interwebs. If you need help, <a href="http://lmgtfy.com/?q=music+from+girls+on+HBO">here you go</a>. Instead, I enlisted the help of our resident expert in music, Infinity Guitars, to hit you with a cocaine fueled play list. It's sure to get you jacked up for your weekend. Enjoy. </i><br />
<br />
<u>The Far-From-Comprehensive Guide to Listening to Music While Snorting Cocaine</u><i> </i><br />
If there’s anything this episode taught us, it’s that
cocaine and music are an inseparable pair. They go together so well that, like lamb and tuna fish, it’s a
drag to consume one without the other. Right?<u> </u>Elijah and Hannah may be sinking to new relative lows while
licking those nasty bar room toilets for gummies, but it sure sounded cool when
they did it. That’s because proper music, when paired with cocaine, makes even
the most deplorable public bathroom activities fun and adventurous. So if you’ve got a fat sack in your pocket and not a tune to
inhale it to, fret not, we got you covered. Our gift to you:<br />
<br />
<b>Rage Against the
Machine</b> <br />
If it’s your first time doing coke, no one’s promising
anything but that your heart’s going to beat a lot faster, so since it’s breakfast
time and you’re rarin’ and ready to go already, “<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BnkV8f8SGo" target="_blank">Wake Up</a>” is a logical
way to start the day; go ahead and fuck shit up. While you’re at it, consume
some nasal edibles while blasting “<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWXazVhlyxQ" target="_blank">Killing in the Name</a>.”
I’m feelin’ the funk blast already.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJ8MvnEVCqM" target="_blank">Can’t You Hear Me Knockin? –
Rolling Stones</a><br />
Taking your coke with whiskey? Cool, us too. Try this opening
riff with a nice thick line o’ powder and find someone to knock out. The
Beatles never did much for me when it came to cocaine, but if Hannah and
Elijah
ever decide to do three tabs of acid and drink a bunch of cough syrup,
we’ll be
sure to do another one of these. Whiskey, cocaine, and the Stones:
you’re officially ready to get your Cocaine Pirate Swag poppin’.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IewQqGpdmh8" target="_blank">Da Funk
– Daft Punk</a><br />
Miss the dance tent in ‘98? The clacking bubblegum, the
girls in tube socks, the<b> </b>Germans.
Here’s a healthy serving of boom-bap eargasms to throw you back. You’re
dancing, you’re having a good time, you’re sweating, you’re loving life. When
suddenly… You can feel your gums again. No matter. Excuse yourself, make all
that yay disappear inside your face holes, and get back in the mix. You can
start the song over too, if you want. <br />
Spike Jonze directed the video, and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmi60Bd4jSs" target="_blank">it’s pretty fuckin
sweet</a>. That dog could definitely use some coke.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FU4cnelEdi4" target="_blank">Puppy – Netsky</a><br />
EDM douche-noggins, this is for you. Play it, snort your shit,
and get out of the bathroom. Bonus: There’s cowbell.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsTJaP2tC0A" target="_blank">White Lines – Grand Master
Flash</a> <br />
Legend has it that Grand Master Flash consumed $7,000 worth
of cocaine in preparation for the recording of this song, but I just made that
up, so who’s to say? Interestingly, despite the fact that it’s clearly an
awesome song to snort yay to, it also clearly has an anti-drug message embedded
within. <br />
Think about <i>that. </i>Freebase!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2wqmGu1EY8" target="_blank">Everyone Nose – N.E.R.D</a><br />
<i>All the girls standing
in the line for the bathroom, all the girls standing in the line for the
bathroom.</i> We know what they’re doing. Cocaine. They’re gonna do a
bunch of cocaine together and then come out all wobbly, and they’ll have
enjoyed themselves because this was playing in the background. Sneezing up
hundred dollar bills and shit. Pharrell most certainly knows what’s good.<br />
<br />
<u>And Some Songs to Avoid While Snorting Cocaine</u><br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYS732zyYfU" target="_blank">Cocaine
– Eric Clapton</a><br />
It’s just kind of a bummer. Maybe this was fun to do cocaine
to when they invented cocaine. This old ass live video is the closest you’ll
come to enjoying it while inhaling that crystal white.<br />
<br />
Ayo for Yayo – Andre Nickatina<br />
We’re not going to make it easy to play this one, no link
for you.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4EItD1aOCI" target="_blank">Kim -
Eminem</a><br />
You’ll be in a shitty, tweaked out mood.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upkYQqbrjSc" target="_blank">And finally.... This</a><br />
<br />
<br />
Enjoy the habit.<br />
<br />
-- Infinity Guitars Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-61560405991738293502013-01-29T08:18:00.002-08:002013-01-29T08:19:19.458-08:00Twice as Sweet as Sugar, Twice as Bitter as Salt<b><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;"></span></b>What a weekend for Booth Jonathan, huh? Co-starring in <a href="http://www.hulu.com/watch/450051">the best SNL digital short</a> since <i>Dick in a Box</i>
on Saturday night, then following it up on Sunday by giving Marnie an
inverted snow angel. But I’m getting ahead of myself I think. <br />
<br />
So, Hannah scores a gig as a freelance writer for the online magazine <i>Jazzhate</i>,
which is good news. The less good news is that they’re only concerned
with faux edgy topics like {GASP} drug use! Now Hannah needs to score a
whole bunch of coke so she can write all about this incredibly novel
experience that's never been written about before. Hannah is resolute to
make the magic happen, even if it’s outside her comfort zone, so down
the rabbit hole she goes. Only catch is Jessa, the group’s resident
ne’er-do-well, can’t cop any drugs for her. As a last resort, Hannah
drops in on her junkie recovering neighbor, Laird. Like <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLd9MZYQwy0">most coke addicts</a>
(sorry, I’m on a Lonely Island digital short kick right now) the guy
has some boundary issues as evidenced by his accurate description of
Hannah’s daily schedule and magazine subscriptions. But he does have a
cool pet turtle and lots of pomegranate juice, so he’s some what getting
his shit together. Despite his new found sobriety, he agrees to get the
blow for Hannah.
<br />
<div>
<br />
But with all this yayo…what to do?!?!
Leave it to Elijah, coke-night planner extraordinaire. Obviously
dancing. Obviously. Punching a <a href="http://www.glamour.com/entertainment/blogs/obsessed/2012/07/where-are-they-now-disney-chan.html">former Disney star</a>?
Check. “Power-clashing” outfit inspired by a middle school incest
victim? Of course. By 4pm, the two are already jacked up to the point
that they’re writing down their incoherent ramblings on the apartment
walls in sharpie. It’s gonna be a long fucking night.</div>
<div>
<br />
While
Marnie is hostessing in her little Von Trapp suspenders, she runs into
the aforementioned Booth Jonathan. He doesn’t even remember her name,
but that certainly doesn't stop him from pulling her out of the
restaurant by her wrist so they can have sex. Back at his apartment,
Boothe shows off his art (ie. a bloody doll house and a lockable stand
up closet that flickers disturbing animal <span style="font-size: small;">images </span>and
blares Duncan Shiek. In all honesty, the modern art isn't the strangest
thing about Booth. You know what is? The fact that he still uses <a href="http://www.thesoundarchive.com/play-wav-files.asp?sound=email/youGotmail.wav">AOL mail</a>.
Now that's some weird hipster shit. When Marnie is finally let out from
the sensory box she's completely overwhelmed but emerges with one
realization however misguided: “you’re so fucking talented”. The
sensitive artist persona is a tough hand to play if you want to get laid
but gotta hand it to him. kid's got game.<br />
<br />
At this
point in the night, Hannah and Elijah appear to be on a lot more than
just coke. In a state of seemingly unrealistic drug induced euphoria,
Hannah changes shirts with some pony tailed bike messenger type on the
dance floor. Sporting a see through mesh tank top, Hannah marches off to
the bathroom with Elijah to do more blow off a toilet seat cover. If
that's the only available surface that's one thing. But they're really
going to do gummies off the seat also? Gross. Catalyzed by the coke's
truth serum effect, Elijah confesses to banging Marnie. Hannah takes
this news pretty much exactly as we'd expect...by sweating bullets,
dousing her entire head in sink water and screaming “I hate you!”.<br />
<br />
Even though Elijah reminds Hannah that his dalliance with Marnie is none of her concern, Hannah is still <a href="http://www.comedycentral.com/video-clips/6fsoay/workaholics-butthurt">pretty butthurt</a>
about the whole thing. Ever competitive with Marnie, Hannah decides to
kiss Elijah in the drug store aisle. Maybe she can get 4 pumps out of
him and prove to Marnie once and for all that she's superior in at least
one way. She might even be able to capitalize on this plan but right
then, out of the corner of her eye, she spots a lurking Laird in the
next aisle. Laird is overcome with guilt for introducing the innocent
Hannah to a world of drugs and bad decisions and admits that he's been
following her just like the mom in <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0477302/">Really Loud and Close</a>.
World's most mediocre movie of all time, don't see it. Still struggling
with addiction, Laird reveals that he bought himself some smack, which
I'm pretty sure is part of <a href="http://www.12steprecovery.com/12-steps-of-na.html">Step 2</a>,
before giving it up to Elijah so he can stay on his road to recovery.
Since he has nothing else going on that night, other than shopping for
socks before going home to hang out with his turtle, Laird tags along as
Hannah and Elijah decide to do a surprise drop-in on Marnie, who is
currently wiping cum out of her box at Booth's house.<br />
<br />
When
they arrive at the Booth Jonathan fortress unannounced, Hannah cuts to
the chase immediately. "I know about you and Elijah" she tells Marnie.
Marnie is stung, and if you recall, she wanted to tell Hannah all along
but Elijah swore her to secrecy, not the other way around. Hannah, never
shying away from being over dramatic and extremely egocentric, is at
this point preparing us for an out of control maniacal coke rant. But
that isn't what happens exactly. Instead, we get one of her more salient
epiphanies; an accurate realization of the friendship dynamic between
her and Marnie. Fashion advice and lunch dates do not make a good
friend. The only thing that matters is not doing the things that will
intentionally hurt somebody else. And that's where Marnie has failed
Hannah. Everything else is meaningless, petty bullshit and Hannah can
see that clearly now. See? Drugs are good. They help you think.</div>
<br />
Marnie goes to
puke and Hannah takes the momentary break in the action to remind
Elijah that he's going to have to move out because he ruined her: (1)
article (2) night (3) relationship with Marnie (4) relationship with
coke, which could have been her favorite drug. In the world’s worst
carnie game of all time, the consolation prize is that Laird takes you
home. Most disturbingly to anybody who has to watch, Hannah and Laird go
at it in the hallway because Hannah clearly gives zero fucks about
anything anymore. And now she has AIDS. Probably. Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-35049069791957439522013-01-25T08:25:00.002-08:002013-01-25T08:25:58.785-08:00Pour One Out for Adam<i>Happy Friday and if you're anywhere along the Eastern seaboard,
stay fucking warm. Or try to at least. I got a submission today from an
old work colleague of mine just itching to give her take on</i> <i>Ep 2. If you find any of her ramblings remotely interesting, you can follow her on Twitter @Carahessels. </i><br />
<br />
<i><span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><u><i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Pour One Out For Adam</span></i></u></i></span></i><br />
Surprising
to no one anywhere, George broke up with Elijah once he heard the news
of the single-digit-pump affair with Marnie. George eventually storms
out, but not before giving a few fuck you’s to Charlotte, Elija’s
mother, and twisting that little knife called guilt in Elijah’s gut for
keeping this secret from Hannah. Look, I don’t want to hate Marnie. I
really don’t. I enjoy looking at her and… well, that’s about it. But
seriously, as the female writer of the week I have to ask - where is the
girl code? Gay, straight, bi, boner, beautiful naked (whatever, he is),
Elijah is still Hannah’s ex beau of two and a half years. I don’t care
how down and desperate Marnie was feeling in that moment, chick should
have kept her legs closed. And after deciding to go through with it, she
should have shown at least ONE nip. If you’re already asking him to get
a condom and you’re still kinda uncertain about his sexuality, you can
show him a nip. Just saying. So Marnie is a prude-wannabe-hussy. Also,
the sky is blue and the earth revolves around the sun. <br />
<br />
After
Marnie has to experience what is most likely her first real rejection
in life (at her interview) she returns home to shitting-rainbows Shosh
and Ray who are in that phase of their relationship where anything and
everything seems romantic and lovely. Like, bathing a pig for example.
So beautiful. Love this stage. Impossible is nothing. Anyways, it’s
these two lovebirds that give Marnie the idea to get a “pretty person
job.” No, not modeling, but something more along the lines of hostessing
or Champagne Facials, as Matt, aka blog-daddy, pointed out <i><span style="color: cyan;">(Editor's Note: I'm ALL about being referred to as Blog Daddy. Thank you for that.)</span></i>. Now, it is often said that those with “pretty person jobs” also have major <strike>daddy issues</strike>
confidence issues as they exploit their looks, or as Hannah describes
it, cash in on their sexuality for coin. Stigma aside, I think every
girl secretly wants that “pretty person job”. You get power, money and
the opportunity to shake what your mama gave you. Oh, and let’s not
forget the opportunity to <strike>flirt with rich men</strike> work on your interpersonal skills. Why wouldn’t Marnie take the job? <br />
<br />
Finally
enter Jessa, your anything-but-basic bitch and Thomas-John, who looks
better on canvas than in real life. I will never understand this guy. I
just won’t. After running off to his mystery meetings and bestowing
three puppies upon Jessa, TJ disappears for the rest of the show. Again.
Jessa names her three puppies Garbage, Fucker and Channukah (oddly,
three very symbolic words for my own life) and tells Hannah that her
life will never get better than the very moment they are in. Apparently,
everyone’s life can improve but Jessa’s – the girl who married a
stranger. The stranger who she turned down a threesome with to ‘eat
[Marnie’s] cunt on the sidewalk.’ The stranger who makes mashups of
children playing in a field with Vitamin C’s <i>Steal My Sunshine</i>. Right. Him. <br />
<br />
Seemingly unfazed by her breakup with Sandy, <strike>the only black character in the show</strike>,
Hannah is trying to enjoy a night of Internet how-tos when Adam
screams, “SURPRISE!” in her bedroom doorway. Legit, I almost lost my
shit during this scene. I didn’t know what to expect. Roses? A knife?
Lord knows the kid owns a lot of tools. And while Hannah seems freaked,
you know she’s flattered deep down. You can tell by her word choice that
she doesn’t necessarily hate him being there. Here is where I want to
address “don’t” vs. “shouldn’t”. While running in circles, Hannah tells
Adam he shouldn’t come back the next day. “Shouldn’t” implies, “I rather
you didn’t, but you can” whereas “don’t” straight up reads,
“do.not.come.back.” Though Hannah’s physical actions are saying “GET OUT
OF MY FACE, OUT MY FACE!” her words really say, “Get out of my face…
for now.” Guarantee Hannah goes through a whole want what you can’t
have/grass is always greener sort of thing when Adam leaves her alone
for good, or even for a day, and she misses his comfort, attention and
need for her. <br />
<br />
I found this entire scene especially tragic. In a matter of minutes, Adam runs<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: inherit;">the</span></span>
gambit of emotions, quickly going from creepy, to sweet, to frantic, to
the verge of tears and an emotional breakdown with the realization that
his relationship with Hannah might truly be over. Real talk, the tears
work every time for me. Seeing a manchild cry right before you (me) can
be so gut-wrenching that you (I) actually forget all of the f’ed up shit
that has happened in the relationship, even if it occurred only minutes
before. You (I) think to yourself (myself), this is my moment, this is
my <i>Notebook</i> moment! He loves me SO much that he is actually
crying, CRYING, for me. LET’S BE TOGETHER FOREVER! I LOVE YOU! But no,
Hannah holds firm. Stronger than I, she only offers up a brief, but deep
stare at Adam, the meaning of which we may never know, only to be
interrupted by none other than… uh oh, smells like bacon. This scene was
enough to make even me feel uncomfortable. Imagine having to admit you
called the cops on your ex… in front of your ex? AWKIES! And for the nth
time, we find ourselves feeling bad for poor Adam. <br />
<br />
Regardless,
rough as it was to watch Adam get carted off by the popo, I think every
chick’s inner sex goddess stood proudly for just a second and saluted
Hannah for her resolve, however crazy it might have been… because
honestly, who wouldn’t find a little pleasure in witnessing their ex
getting cuffed by New York’s finest? Hannah screams from the top of the
steps, “I just wanted him to stop texting me!” and in that moment, she
debases their entire relationship to what it truly is: a fucked up,
twenty-something, you live and you learn, sometimes the hardest thing
and the right thing are the same type of romance. More or less, a song
from The Fray.<br />
<br />
So let’s all pour one out for Adam. And by ‘one’ I mean a big ol’ glass of milk. <br />
<br />
Till next time, ya sad little glowworms!<br />
<br />
-- @Carahessels<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></i></span>Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-91739589876914854232013-01-22T08:13:00.006-08:002013-01-22T09:36:35.083-08:00Put My Thang Down, Flip It, and Reverse It<br />
It
may have been 3 pumps, possibly only 2 1/2, but George is done with
Elijah. Infidelity and bi-curiosity are two unattractive traits in a gay
relationship...I would think. Hannah is none the wiser though and has
no idea that Elijah and Marnie banged on her living room couch. This is
for the better since Hannah can't help but take everything personally
and would somehow find a way to relate their activities to her own
shortcomings. And if her own shortcomings are starting to drag her down,
Hannah is at least making strides to address them. Albeit through
self-help Youtube clips on <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLFBhCOVx4E">cutting your own hair</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rfuNK1_ipk">dancersize</a>, but, you know, baby steps.<br />
<br />
In
a reversal of fortune, Marnie is now the unemployable one. Even in her
best Ann Taylor suit, she is unable to impress at her interview. Her
interviewer (played by Lena Dunham's real life mother and real life
artist, <a href="http://www.lauriesimmons.net/">Laurie Simmons</a>) can
only feign interest in Marnie's qualifications and is much more focused
on verbally lashing her intern for not dunking her teabag in the desired
manner. If the intern <i>really</i> needs instruction on <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=teabag">tea bagging</a>,
I'm sure there are plenty of guys who would be willing to help out. To
add insult to injury, Marnie returns home to the sight of Shosh and Ray
deeply immersed in lovey-dovey pillow talk. Most of their discussion
revolves around the merits of bathing a baby pig together but they do
offer one constructive tidbit when they plant the seed in Marnie's head
that she might be better off getting a "pretty person's job". For the
love of God, please let that job be at <a href="http://champagnefacials.tumblr.com/">Champagne Facials</a>.<br />
<br />
Thomas-John
wants to look pretty also so he dons his fanciest fedora and poses
shirtless on a stool for Jessa. This guy infuriates me. I want nothing
more than for there to be 3 more of him in this scene so I can flip that
stool over, get a little creative so that all four of them could sit on
the stool at the same time. Between the matching tiger tattoo, his
affinity for "Dana's" shorteralls, and his fucking "meetings" it's a
mystery as to how Jessa can stomach the sight of him. He does give
surprise gifts though, which bitches love, and in this case it's quite
literally an entire box of bitches. Not to be overshadowed by <a href="http://www.cracked.com/article_15765_the-20-most-bizarre-celebrity-baby-names.html">all the celebrities, </a>Jessa names her new puppies Garbage, Fucker, and Channukah.<br />
<br />
Emboldened
by Jessa, Hannah confronts Sandy and asks why he hasn't read her story
yet. At first he tries taking the easy route, saying he hasn't read it,
but under more pressure he eventually folds and admits to not only
reading it, but also not liking it. Admittedly, the quality of writing
is strong, but like everything else we've known Hannah to write,
"nothing happens in it". Hannah takes this slight and tries to draw a
parallel to their difference of opinion when it comes to politics. Sandy
was able to brush of the condescending political comments from Elijah
earlier in the morning but at this point he's done laying down for the
flaming liberals. There's only so much he can be baited before going <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6Uvvp3lIKM">militant-black-ballistic</a>.
Sandy calls their relationship for exactly what it is (Hannah's desire
to dip her toes into something a little more exotic and exciting...
a.k.a. "black") which Hannah denies vehemently. But she doesn't exactly
do herself any favors when she starts quoting <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UODX_pYpVxk"><i>Work It</i> </a>and
then claiming she didn't even realize Sandy was black. All in all, her
relationship with Sandy is a pretty good allegory for the show's entire
relationship with racial minorities: a half-assed and short lived
attempt at diversity for the purpose of breaking up painful monotony. <br />
<br />
When
Marnie settles on a hostess job (much to my chagrin, I thought
Champagne Facials was a promising career for her) it doesn't seem like
the worst choice. $400 a day, good hours, and lots of social time is
most people's idea of a decent job. Hannah on the other hand can't help
but take a dig, reminding Marnie that her $40 job is more noble because
she's made the "choice" to not cash in on her sexuality. "Choice" would
be one way to put it. Another way to put it would be that nobody in
their right mind would hire an overly tattooed, overly weighted, and
overly condescending person to greet prospective diners. On the bright
side, Marnie does get to dress like a slutty <a href="http://www.rnh.com/videos.html?video=122&gallery=41&vpg=3">Von Trapp</a>
child. Fun side note on that video: I actually sent that out to my old
company's list serve of several hundred very confused employees before
picking up and walking out. Fact.<br />
<br />
Hannah may feel sorry
for Marnie, but she certainly doesn't feel sorry for Adam. Not after
all his unsolicited acoustic love songs. Not after his late night texts.
Certainly not after !SURPRISE! he lets himself into her apartment and
jumps out from behind the doorway to scare her while she's in bed.
Hannah is a bit freaked out, understandably so, and dials 911 before
reconsidering and hanging up. Damage already done though. Adam pours his
heart out, both applauding her resolve to try and end things while also
admitting that "as a man living his man life", he's not ready to give
up quite yet. But to no avail. Hannah pleads for him to just leave her
alone and there's so much hurt and desperation in her voice that for the
first time Adam realizes he's fighting a losing battle.<br />
<br />
With
his tail squarely between his legs, Adam slinks off, but wait, Hannah
calls him back. There's a pregnant pause as the two stand in the door
way and maybe, just maybe, Hannah is about to take him back. We'll never
know. That's when the cops show up. Rather unfortunately for Adam, an
unpaid public urination summons means he can't plead ignorance to this
whole fiasco. He's gotta take a night time field trip to the slammer.
Ain't that just like the po-po? Always <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcaDv6ZdxuM">there when you don't want 'em</a>,
and never there when you need 'em? <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSLLGgSPRVo">Story of my life</a>.
Hannah gets off easy, allowed to stay at her apartment even though all
the stalking started with her, a pair of knee socks, and a <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=jason+mask&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=qrf-UPydC-bF0AHDkYGgDw&biw=1002&bih=557&sei=sbf-UKfaEM6o0AHfqYCACA">Jason mask</a>.
From the top of the staircase she can do nothing but watch as Adam is
dragged away and weakly mumble what should really be her life mantra at
this point: "I'm so sorry". Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-29168683696953737362013-01-15T06:53:00.003-08:002013-01-15T06:54:48.031-08:00It's Back! It's Really Back!In its triumphant return to Sunday night prime time, GIRLS begins Season 2 with the same shot as Season 1: a pan up starting from a set of feet, to reveal Hannah playing little spoon in a morning cuddle session. This time though, Marnie is not her cuddle buddy. She has been replaced by Elijah, Hannah's old boy friend and now new roomie. Even though Elijah's boner is reserved for somebody else, things appear to be going a lot better for Hannah than they were when we last saw her. She's all about her new roommate (going so far as to set preliminary plans for a whole array of theme nights including Fondue Night, Crafts Night, Japanese Snacks Night, and French Salon Night), has 3 jobs, and is getting served a steady dose of Jungle Fever. On that last point, I must say if this is Dunham's response to constant debate about <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/29/arts/television/hbos-girls-is-hardly-the-only-example-of-monochromatic-tv.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0">the show's lack of diversity</a>, she doesn't exactly put the "b" in subtle. But not everybody is satisfied with their life arcs. Shosh is spinning in circles, burning incense and trying to work out the kinks in her "ruin Ray's life" mantra while Marnie is getting laid off from her job.<br />
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Then there's Adam, who's definitely worse for the wear. In a full leg cast from <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDjOCjtxNAA">getting run over</a> by that pesky car, Adam is bed ridden and reduced to pissing in a bucket. Even though they are no longer dating, Hannah is there to help out, (clearly burdened with guilt) but there to help nonetheless. There's still some form of love between the two but a cloud of smoldering anger and resentment is present. For now, as Adam puts it, Hannah is just his "main hang" and not much more. Sandy (Hannah's new love interest played by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ULdm2NLrN4E">funny man Donald Glover</a>) would prefer that Hannah informs Adam of their newly blossoming relationship but Hannah decides to withhold this bit of info from Adam, seemingly unable to cut the cord quite yet.</div>
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I started to dissect Marnie's lunch with her Chelsea Handler wannabe mother, but honestly, it's just a whole dramatic mother-daughter snippy conversation that I can't even begin to relate to. So I'll pass.</div>
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Plenty of action at Hannah and Elijah's party though. We've got karaoke performances from half the cast at one point or another, Elijah's boyfriend George gets <a href="http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/white%20girl%20wasted">white</a><a href="http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/white%20girl%20wasted"> girl wasted</a> and gets bounced from the soiree, and there are a couple of rendezvous (rendezvouses? rendezvii?) between exes. Shoshanna tries to play cold to Ray with a flippant "Oh, Hello...GOOD. BYE." but she can't fight him off for long. Ray catches up with Shosh alone in a bedroom, charms the audience with some topical Emoji humor, confesses he still has feelings for her, and then swoops her into his arms for an <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4iTCDWQXYlY">instant </a><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4iTCDWQXYlY">classic kiss</a>. While we don't know exactly what happened between the two, it seems to be a moot point now. Marnie and Charlie's catch up isn't quite as romantic. While Charlie waits outside the bathroom for Audrey like a lap dog, in his typical subservient fashion, he tries shooting the shit with Marnie. Audrey may be a bigger bitch to Charlie than Marnie ever was, but that doesn't prevent Charlie from trying to wax poetic on how amazing their relationship is. Audrey storms out after she can't score any weed and even as Marnie tries to lick his wounds (and possibly more), Charlie assures Marnie things are great between them. The kid just can't help but <a href="http://www.metacafe.com/watch/an-dHgZbu4Jnhnnu/the_40_year_old_virgin_2005_hanging_out/">put the pussy on a pedestal</a>.</div>
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After Hannah disposes of Elijah's boyfriend (who's a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9am7P9pWo8">dead ringer as Buffalo Bill</a>'s doppelganger, by the way) she slips out of the house to drop off a bag of supplies and meds for Adam. When Adam tries to get her to stay and hang out, plying her with balloon faces and director's cut scenes from Baggar Vance, he doesn't get the response he was looking for so he pulls out the big guns. "You're the best thing in my life. I don't know how to behave without you. I'd die if you go away." Even at that, Hannah is somewhat nonplussed. Adam doesn't buy her ambivalence but Hannah firmly reminds him that their relationship, whatever it may be at this point, is not on his terms. It's on hers.</div>
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Back at the apartment, the party has been abandoned and only Marnie and Elijah remain, as they belt out karaoke jams on the couch. You might not be able to tell from this scene, but Allison Williams actually has <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/13/allison-williams-brian-wi_n_761128.html">some serious musical chops</a>. Elijah confides in Marnie, telling her about his sometimes confusing sexual orientation, and how he still finds himself attracted to women at times. More insecure and desperate than we've ever seen her (no job, no boyfriend, no Hannah) Marnie clearly has nothing to lose when Elijah makes his move on her.</div>
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As the clothes start to come off, we brace for what will be known as the best 15 seconds in television history. Every time Allison Williams gets naked, an <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usfiAsWR4qU">angel gets its wings</a>...and a raging boner. However, the show's writers and director are sadistic animals and all we get is a little bit of sideboob. Even Elijah is turned off by this cruel twist, immediately losing wood. Marnie tries to console him, reminding him that he doesn't need to pretend to be something he isn't, but Elijah shoots the same observation right back at her. Broken and truly lonely, Marnie shows up at Charlie's place to spend the night in the company of somebody she trusts. It looks like she IS the wound, after all.</div>
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Oh right, and then there's Jessa who gets tossed in there as an afterthought for good measure. Judging by the cornrows and puka shell necklaces, Jessa and new hubby Thomas-John have just returned from their honey moon and they are still head over heals for each other. So that's nice. As Episode 1 closes, we know that we're in for a lot of what we expected this season: angsty life drama, tons of awkward sex, and Hannah will be naked. A lot. If you bet any money otherwise, looks like you lost your office pool.</div>
</div>
Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-53795932737714176912013-01-09T11:20:00.000-08:002013-01-09T11:37:39.239-08:00Girls Like Guys Who Like "GIRLS"<i><span style="font-family: inherit;">With the season premier only 4 days away, @newyorksiddy dropped by to give us her two cents on the show. When she isn't running around as Associate Producer for the TODAY Show, @newyorksiddy is dropping knowledge and backing up all us guys who watch (read: enjoy) the show. </span></i><span style="font-family: inherit;"><i>If you wanna <a href="http://amandasidman.com/index.html">read more from @newyorksiddy then go right ahead. </a></i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Here's the thing
about "Girls": It's the best TV show ever. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">It reminds me of a
scene from season 1, episode 7: On the way to a Bushwick warehouse party (“all
of Brooklyn and two-thirds of Manhattan” were there), Jemima Kirke’s character Jessa
says "Jaded as I am, I still hold out hope that the next party will
be the best party ever."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“O.K., best party
ever," Lena Dunham's character Hannah ponders. "To me that's
like saying best gym ever or best nature documentary ever -- how good can it
really be?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">One might think the
same of a TV show. The answer, in this case, is simple: it’s really fucking
good. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">And despite what many
may have assumed from the title -- the show isn't of the chick variety. I think
many men I know (at least all of them in Brooklyn and two-thirds in Manhattan)
assumed “Girls” would turn Sunday nights back into the hell that was 1998-2004
(also known as the "Sex And The City" era). It was a dark period defined by a
lot of endless stereotypes about supposed Manhattan women (everything from
unrealistically expensive clothing to equally as unbelievable relationships)
that became the fantasy for every woman who has ever lived here (disclaimer: I
could probably recite the entire six seasons in their entirety). <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For guys, it was a particular low point. The show magnified everything they had ever feared about New York women. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">While
"Girls" is exactly the opposite of its predecessor, it's still
fascinating that guys find the show so endearing. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For a long time, I thought that my guy friends didn't want to
know what girls were actually like. We don’t all look that great naked. Sex can
be alarmingly awkward. Some of us are still virgins. Some, like Jessa, are free
spirited, emotionally unavailable, and downright out of their minds. Some are
an incredibly annoying combination of uptight and gorgeous, like Marnie. Some
are quirky, vibrant, and not particularly good at smoking crack -- like
Shoshana. And some, like Hannah, are still trying to figure out who they are.
That’s just how we roll. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">And that's the reason
that every self-respecting man I know watches every Sunday. Maybe it's just as refreshing
for them as it is for us ladies to watch a show about girls who look a little
something like the girls they actually know in their lives: their girlfriends,
co-workers, sisters, friends. They are complicated, kind of crazy, really
fucking hilarious, and a whole lot of fun. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">"Girls" has
made Sunday nights like the best party, ever. Boys allowed. <a href="http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=918121899047132584" name="_GoBack"></a> </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">-- @newyorksiddy </span></div>
Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-918121899047132584.post-33937108718865385112012-12-10T12:38:00.002-08:002012-12-10T12:38:41.493-08:00What's this all about anyway?Last April, I was enjoying a very typical Sunday. A few of my friends
came over to watch the afternoon baseball games, eat some pizza, and cap
it all off with a little Sunday night TV. It's a routine many people
are familiar with, and since HBO, AMC, and Showtime have been
consistently pumping out excellent programming for several years now,
it's a routine that has become both comfortable and reliable. But that
all changed last April.<br />
<br />
As Eastbound & Down came to a close, HBO's program interlude
announced there would be a series premier of a new show starting in just
a few minutes. We made the executive decision to give the new show a
test run and the rest as they say is history. That's because every
Sunday which followed that fateful night, our small man-tribe reconvened
to sit and watch <i>GIRLS </i>together.<br />
<br />
Now I know what you want to ask...why would a group of self-proclaimed
straight guys cram onto a couch with each other and watch this show?
Well, it's not a question that will be answered here. It just happened
and it's going to keep on happening as long as the show is running.<br />
<br />
Since day one, we've watched this show and been equal parts entertained,
horrified, confused, and empowered. Entertained because, frankly, the
show is well-written and cleverly conceived; horrified because the
character arcs resemble the social tendencies of our friends a bit too
closely; confused because for a group of 25 year old males, there is
nothing as perplexing as a bunch of 25 year old females; empowered
because our earliest convictions on the grade school playgrounds about
girls being icky, cootie-infested lunatics appeared to be holding
water. <br />
<br />
My name is Matt, and for better or worse this is my blog. Many of the
posts will be my own but I'll be receiving help all season long from my
room mates and friends who watch the show by my side. Their names,
unlike mine, will be protected with aliases so as to ensure their
friendships, relationships, and employment status as long as the blog is
running. We hope you enjoy our comments, questions, and ruminations on
all things <i>GIRLS. </i><br />
<br />
I'm sorry. <i> </i>Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17363919254933651012noreply@blogger.com0